Unwanted

I am unwanted, but desired in the highest degree. You say you want me, and not just for my body. How am I ever supposed to believe that when you can just drop me and walk away without a second glance? The last time I was sure that it didn’t hurt becuase I was just so angry at you, and at myself. The anger faded and there it was. The pain simply waited for me to start feeling again, then it slowly crept into my heart. This time was nothing like the last. I miss you, but I don’t want you back. I hope to run into you so that you can see how good I am doing. So that I can see if you’re doing just as good. To be able to casually tell you what’s been going on without actually getting in touch. Just to sate some curiosity. Now that we are worlds closer, our hearts couldn’t be farther apart. I keep wondering what things would be like right now if I had been worth the wait. If you hadn’t jumped the gun and thrown me away. I guess time will only tell half of these questions, and the other half may very well remain mysteries. It’s alright now though. I am ok. I survived you.